We are coming up on two years since we shook up our lives looking for a new adventure, sold our beautiful waterfront home, drove across the country and bought a farmhouse in rural Maine. The plan was to slow down, semi-retire (work only for ourselves) and live our best lives. And for the most part that has happened – I truly have no complaints. But winters in Maine are long and cold, and sometimes the noise gets loud and distracting. In early November I realized there was a dull anxiety cloud hanging over me preventing me from just relaxing and living slow. It stemmed from the realization that the country was about to go to Helena Handbasket (which by the way is my favorite drag name).
That’s when I got the idea to let go. No more doom scrolling, reduce my news intake to only once a day, and focus on what I can control in order to live more fully in every moment. The positive effect was immediate. I strategically reduced my digital footprint, cut back on headlines, deleted a few social media apps and turned my focus inward. If 2005 me was reading this, she would not believe her eyes.
You’ll find a few crumbs left on Instagram and Facebook (seriously, I’m only keeping my account to chat with my mom), but I’ve updated my privacy settings to be way more exclusive. I’m only sharing my thoughts and activities in places where the stakes are low. That means Pinterest (my favorite platform for sharing ideas in a visual format) and my own website/blog that I pay Wix to host for me. It feels revolutionary, but it also feels like coming home. I had a very successful blog back before the social media boom, and it was the best tool for connecting with like minded people and promoting small businesses and events. The many social media companies that have emerged since then are all competing for my attention, but offering nothing in return. Whether it’s an algorithm issue or true censorship, I hear so many people complaining about their accounts getting suppressed or deleted. What they might not realize is that it can happen because you don’t own anything you put on someone else’s platform.
When there was talk about Tiktok being banned (which still may happen, who knows) I felt sad because I really enjoy some of the entertainment I view on Tiktok, but I have no stake in it. I don’t make videos, I just watch them. My advice to anyone relying on a social media platform for a following or for making money is this: Get in, get your following and get out. Build something of your own that no one can take away from you.
Ultimately what began as a reaction to the noise and negativity out there has helped me achieve that slow living, more authentic life in just four short months of practice. Thanks to a few other changes in habits, I’m sleeping better and more than ever, I’m cooking healthy meals and have lost 15 pounds, and I’m focusing my emotional energy on my world, not the outside world. And it’s entirely possible that the last item in that list is the key.
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